Will the Democrats Claim It's Just a "Wide Stance" Too?

The Democrats' public professions of enmity towards Wall Street remind me of the anti-gay rhetoric of disgraced former Senator Larry “Wide Stance” Craig. In his public life, Senator Craig was very outspoken in his condemnations of homosexuality; in their public life, the Democrats are very outspoken in their condemnations of Wall Street. As we learned after a revealing incident in an airport bathroom, Senator Craig’s public mask and his private face were vastly different. The Democrats are every bit as two-faced as the former Senator, and just like him when they’re out of the public view they’re cruising for under-stall action with the object of their public animosity: Wall Street.

Take Senate Banking Committee Chris Dodd, for example: Earlier this week, on the Senate floor, Dodd railed against Goldman Sachs and Magnetar (the hedge fund hijinks of each firm having been previously discussed in this blog here and here, respectively) culminating with the punchline:

"So the problem is not that these executives got rich without contributing to America. The problem is that these executives got rich betting against America."

Watch his indignation:



"Betting against America" is a pretty strong indictment. The Senator must have been so proud of himself for making it in full public view that he forgot to mention that after the investment banks bet against America they shared their winnings with him. From Goldman Dodd received $273,466, and from the relative upstart Magnetar he accepted at least $6,900. Not too shabby. I can't help but wonder if the Senator and his donors ever sing this Magnetar-inspired song to each other:

Bet Against the American Dream from Alexander Hotz on Vimeo.

And Chris Dodd's not the only one having a closeted love affair with Wall Street--not by a long shot! It's widespread: Kirsten Gillibrand, Barack Obama, Rahm Emanuel, Charles Schumer, Harry Reid, former House Democratic Leader Dick Gephardt is now a Goldman Sachs lobbyist, our Congresswoman Mary Jo Kilroy has accepted $52,736 from the Securities and Investment industry--and that doesn't even include the Magnetar money laundered to her by Rahm Emanuel--the list goes on and on and on. So many Democrats, so hot for Wall Street cash, but also, so very ashamed to admit their hearts' desire.

Can you imagine the scenes?

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A flustered and slightly sweaty Rahm Emanuel popping out of a coat closet after an afternoon quickie cell-phone call to Magnetar Capital CEO Alec Litowitz.

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Senator Chris Dodd getting his war chest stuffed in the back of a Citigroup executive's limousine.

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Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid sitting on a bench in a secluded section of a public park smiling coyly at a cute jogger in a Goldman Sachs t-shirt.

"Oh yes! He winked at me! More cash for Harry!" he congratulates himself after the encounter.

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Congresswoman Mary Jo Kilroy buttoning up her purse with a freshly cut check from Goldman Sachs Managing Director David P. Solomon inside as she leaves his New York office.

"But Mary Jo, what if your constituents find out?" the breathless banker asks.

Emphatically the Congresswoman replies, "They won't!" And then, unleashing even more of her passion for Wall Street cash, "They could never understand OUR LOVE!"

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Of course those were dramatizations. In reality, the Democrats surely have a far more sophisticated and organized method of setting up Wall Street bankers with the politicians who love them than the ol' Larry Craig tap-and-whistle. The major difference as I see it, is that Senator Craig is deserving of pity for the tortured life he surely had. The Democrats, however, deserve only contempt for their deception. In stepping out on us to dally with Wall Street bankers the Democrats are inflicting great harm on our country and our future. We should help them come out of the closet by kicking them out of the Congress.